These intertwined themes have been running my life the past few weeks. A lot of questioning, waiting for manifestation, more questioning, struggling, doubt, letting go. Surrender quite likely the correct action, and always the most difficult. This morning's meditation gently reminded me that my spiritual self is biding its sweet time, there within the chaos, despite feeling as if a crazy woman has taken over my mind and emotions. Some sort of easy integration would be really nice right about now, but I don't feel like it's going to happen. It feels more like I just have to "be" with this excruciating uncertainty, ride it out, feel the uncomfortable feelings, look at the shadow. It's murky, dark  and more than a little scary in this place. I may have to reach out for help. It's a leap of faith.

A light, fresh and tasty dinner made with just-picked greens of your own or from the Farmers' Market.

Serves 2

Pre-heat grill

Cut 8 oz cube of firm tofu into 3/4" slices (like cutlets), lay between paper towels and clean dish towel, press with heavy weight such as cast-iron pans to remove water, about 5 min.

Shake together in a med size tupperware 

1-1/2 Tbl sunflower oil

1 Tbl shoyu or tamari

1 tsp agave syrup

2 pinches ginger powder

a couple shakes of cayenne

Put tofu slices in container, shake & swirl to coat with marinade.

Clean and prep grill, place tofu, grill about 4-5 minutes on each side.

[you can also broil or pan-fry. Use fresh grated ginger if you're not starving and desperate to eat.]

If there are any leftovers they can be stored in the same container with excess marinade - without washing! That's the super-lazy part.

4-6 big handfuls of mixed fresh greens (kale, chard, tatsoi, mustard etc)

Heat a bit of good olive oil in saute pan over medium heat

Wash greens well by dunking in a large bowl of water and lifting straight out. Place on towel or drainboard, but leave slightly wet, and rough chop into large pieces.

Peel & smash a clove of garlic, chop very coarsely.

Just as oil begins to shimmer, turn down heat. Add garlic and sprinkle a pinch of coarse sea salt over oil. Add greens to pan, toss to coat about 1 minute. Cover & turn off heat, let sit for about another minute. Done!

No-food, deprivation-type fasts are not really favored in Ayurvedic healing. A more gentle approach is to eliminate certain heavy foods and limit your diet to lightly steamed veggies & cooked grains or kitchari for a day or so, with appropriate herbs and cleansing teas. Or try the soup below, which is wonderfully tasty and satisfying to use for a cleanse. The many herbs help to rest, nourish & detox the digestive system. Try eating only this soup for a day, once a week, and see how much better you feel! Spring is a perfect time to do a little cleansing, inside and out – call or email Madhuri Therapeutics for more information on Ayurvedic lifestyle counseling, and check out our "Intro to Ayurvedic Cooking" class on 4/25!

[*note: You need to start the sprouts 3-4 days before you actually plan to make it. I use only about 3 cups of water for a thicker soup; adjust for your taste].

RECIPE FROM "THE AYURVEDIC COOKBOOK" by Amadea Morningstar and Urmila Desai

The true Self, the Self you feel you've been looking for all your life, the "you" you were always meant to be, is not a phantom or a far-distant goal - it is already right there, inside you, this moment. Like the fabulous outfit that's been at the dry-cleaners, waiting to be picked up, and you just haven't gotten around to getting it. Why hesitate? Take a slow breath and tune in - now. Let the busy thoughts drop away. Feel... your... SELF. There you are. Let that sense fill you completely. Ahh, beautiful. Smile and say "hi!" You are here, you are home. Reside in that peace. Namaste'.

I just noticed that Bravenet has archived all of last year's posts - to see my seasonal musings, recipes and garden photos from 2008 click on the "archived" tab above; individual days within a month will have a box around days with posts. 

eg: GHEE RECIPE was posted on Tues, September 16, 2008.

I realize with some horror that I have not "blogged" since Christmas Day - where have I been and what have I been doing? Well, I can answer that in one evil word - FACEBOOK. It's like blogging for idiots. In the future I will spend more time HERE and exercise my own brain and thoughts... Namaste'!

From my heart to yours - Merry Christmas everyone!!