These intertwined themes have been running my life the past few weeks. A lot of questioning, waiting for manifestation, more questioning, struggling, doubt, letting go. Surrender quite likely the correct action, and always the most difficult. This morning's meditation gently reminded me that my spiritual self is biding its sweet time, there within the chaos, despite feeling as if a crazy woman has taken over my mind and emotions. Some sort of easy integration would be really nice right about now, but I don't feel like it's going to happen. It feels more like I just have to "be" with this excruciating uncertainty, ride it out, feel the uncomfortable feelings, look at the shadow. It's murky, dark  and more than a little scary in this place. I may have to reach out for help. It's a leap of faith.